Alone at Christmas? How to handle the holidays without feeling lonely.

Cinzia DuBois
5 min readDec 11, 2023

Christmas has an uncomfortable magic about it: it’s the only time of year that makes millions of people around the world feel either incredibly wholesome or distressingly empty. Perhaps it’s the rose-tinted Christmas songs and films, the sudden sense of warmth and community which appears out of nowhere between strangers and family members (despite largely being absent the rest of the year), or the glowing joy of generosity and togetherness that bubbles over every social interaction that leaves many feeling every painful absence in their lives all that bit more.

Holidays, especially Christmas, often highlight what’s missing from our lives, whether that’s healthy family connections, friends, financial stability, or romance. The holidays can remind us of past traumas and lost loved ones, which can be even more painful to bear when alone during the season.

I hated Christmas most of my life due to Christmas-related trauma. I hated the fakeness of the holiday, the pseudo-family connections, the consumerism, fighting, and emotional blackmail, and by the time I was nine years into working retail throughout the Christmas holiday season, I was ready to swear off Christmas for life (customers are truly some of the most stomach-churning goblins during the Christmas period).

--

--

Cinzia DuBois

PhD student | Video Essayist | Podcaster | Lady of the Library.