Alone at Christmas? How to handle the holidays without feeling lonely.

Christmas has an uncomfortable magic about it: it’s the only time of year that makes millions of people around the world feel either incredibly wholesome or distressingly empty. Perhaps it’s the rose-tinted Christmas songs and films, the sudden sense of warmth and community which appears out of nowhere between strangers and family members (despite largely being absent the rest of the year), or the glowing joy of generosity and togetherness that bubbles over every social interaction that leaves many feeling every painful absence in their lives all that bit more.

Holidays, especially Christmas, often highlight what’s missing from our lives, whether that’s healthy family connections, friends, financial stability, or romance. The holidays can remind us of past traumas and lost loved ones, which can be even more painful to bear when alone during the season.

I hated Christmas most of my life due to Christmas-related trauma. I hated the fakeness of the holiday, the pseudo-family connections, the consumerism, fighting, and emotional blackmail, and by the time I was nine years into working retail throughout the Christmas holiday season, I was ready to swear off Christmas for life (customers are truly some of the most stomach-churning goblins during the Christmas period).

By my late twenties, I genuinely thought there would never be a moment in my life when I would ever like Christmas, let alone look forward to it. But then, I spent Christmas alone, and everything about the holiday changed. The first Christmas I spent alone was the best Christmas of my life, despite being estranged from my family or any friends in my life at the time. For me, spending Christmas alone was essential for rewriting the script I had about the holiday and the relationship I had with myself and my past.

Holidays alone are hard: they can push people into deep depression, anxiety and sadness, and loneliness is not good for your health. However, if you’re in a situation where you are alone this holiday season, there are alternatives to sinking into that dark, depressive bubble. This holiday does not have to be plagued by your thoughts, traumas, and grief: you can make it a special day with yourself and transform it into a significant milestone in your mental healing…